Heyy!

I like it here! Morning walks and all. I like the ducks here. And i saw a squirrel today! It was soo cutee! It gets lonely here sometimes but mornings at LUMS are beautiful!!! I Like receiving calls from friends from time to time :) SOmeone got a cultus and is what appears to be a crazy Gol Gappa fan! :) I slept at a class time. Missed it. 0.25% of my total grade gone :D but nah, never mind, i am not gona turn into a freak! I gotta take things slowly! LOL and these things happen. The class was at 3:30 and i woke up at 3:50 pm :D But I feel much better now. The past few days were hard,.. asthama and all. It gets so frustuating sometimes, you cant breathe. I cried before sleeping in one of those days. But then I put a smile on ma face and had faith that things wud get better INSHALLAH :) And God listened :) I am much better now. Yeah had dinner at PDc warna hostel mein hi khana magwati thi!
I like my friends here too, we kid around a lot! They tease me with, "Main ja raha hoon." A phrase i use a lot :) If u find ppl of yr type, its much fun!! :) Hostel life is good too. We have a beautiful hostel. It feels like i am writing an essay!
Better get bac to work! I even love the gym here! Aerobics classes are fun :)
Tc byee!

Thats the way I like it

I like it here at LUMS. Its more peaceful, more me. I am finally adjusting here. I like the mornings here.. they are serene and beautiful! I liek my friends here. I feel happier too, i guess. I am happier but then there are ups and downs. The thing i love most abt the dorms is they are well maintained and i can come and get some sleep in between classes if theres a good time gap! I think I am finally adjusting. And setting yr priorities, caring for yr friends feels wonderful!! :) Althoug i am more of a recluse here LOL, running around, doing my chores, mostly alone but i like being wid ppl. I dun follow a particular set of friends to do all activities with, I share activities with different groups of ppl that feels excellent. I like knowing the juniors here that I know, Ahad and Saqib that is.there are certain friends who remain special no matter what!

I am not

I am not ok. I dun feel so. Things are weird. No turning back! I know that things are gonna be fine. I know its gona be alright. But still I am miserable. Yeah, "Hope deferred maketh the heart sick." Its making me sick. I have never felt so lonely in my life. I feel like I dont belong. Its gona take time to adjust. No, I am not crying over going back home. I chose this and I am not backing off. But this is a BIG transition in ma life. I am ok. I will be fine.

I will not not be fine :) Its gona be alright! :)

In LUMS and lovin it!

I am lonely. I am confused. But I have the hope that things are going to be fine! I love this place. The pond, the ducks, the green grass. The hostel too. But room's messy but gotta clean up! I love being here. Its scary being on yr own but it feels good. I do feel insecure. And here, there's this strong need to embrace who u are!!!

Will get back soon!

Things I have learnt at age 19

Got this idea from Absar's blog! :) It seemed lovely so here are my learnt lessons about life...

• I am straight.;)
• I am caring and love to be cared for.
• I have the ability to get up and start anew.
• I can fight and lose or win but I can fight.
• Sometimes the real source to acquire your peace is the power to do something about it.
• Friends matter - a lot. You are bound with family most of the time but its chosen for you. You choose your friends. Fate brings u together but you choose for them to stay.
• If someone is important to you, show them in every way possible.
• Giving a part of yourself can either be the most wonderful, fulfilling experience or the most disgusting, horrifying experience you may have to face. Learn the difference, learn the worth.
• You are worthy. Coz u r living in this moment. What makes it special is your choice to live it. Khalil Gibran passed away. He's gone. No matter how wonderful his writing is, he's not coming back. Hence, find your passions, love your life. Dont let anyone else's writings or works control you for too long.
• If u don't hurt people, life won't give you unsurpassable wounds.
• Making someone feel special(when you mean it) is the most beautiful thing in the world. Its the greatest feeling :)
• If you pick a fallen crumb from a floor, it wont necesarily be what you thought it to be!
• Be gentle with yourself and take care of yourself.
• Forgive yourself for the mistakes you made but always try to fix them.
• If, in a relationship, you receive more negitive or indifferent behaviour than positive, loving behaviour, its not worth being emotionally attached to.

What have u learnt??

Its all coming to me

Why is it all coming back to me? The memories of last year and my struggles. Maybe it signifies closure. which is good.
U know whats the most soothing thing when u wanna get away from everyone and just be yrself when u r really down? sitting on the cool tile floor. I have spent so many minutes lying down on the tile floor, crying so many tears, staring at the ceiling. Its soothing as far as channeling out yr feelings is concerned. But that was months back. Why am i feeling this way now? Closure. It has to be.

I am awfully proud of this!:)

Who is she?
She walks like the night,
Calm and placid like the ocean blue.
But who's she?
I wonder,
If it's important!
She's every person
I've ever come across
She is every man.

She sums up all there is in eternity
And loves with her own heart-and in her own way.
Hate she knows not
Only rage dwells in her heart.
But what are these rare days of serenity?
That manifest in her own self!
Is she two people?
Or just one?
Is she too much?
Or just enough?
Is she loving?
Or lovingly inhumane!
Is she real?
or really a fancy?
What is she?
Where does she come from?
Is she that certain feeling?
Or is she it all?
What makes or breaks her?
WHat are her dreams?
What's so divine that calms her so?
Yet enrages all the same?
Why 2 reactions to the same feeling?
What is she?
That miracle lady?

She is herself,
All alone.
Struggling
Loving and hating all the same.
The calmness that you see is her peace with herself
The pain poses her rage.
In actions imposed
And words revealed.
Feelings manifested,
largely crumpled.
She is but one 'man'
And that is me.

-Naureen

The future

I commented n absar's blog.. abt the future. I think this can even be posted here. It means so much to me coz it compliments my dream!

Hey! A late comment but believe me, i feel i have something worthy to share.I have come to believe that God shows us glimpses of the future. U might see this movie scene, that sort of can be an extension of who u r, or is related to u. A common experience, common dressing, common ambitions. So many things :) I think there are some things u desire. U know for the future. But u see certain things around, in friends, family, media that u find related or fascinating and at times it resembles a part of yr future :)

I just discovered that I cant live without love. It thrives me. And not the fake, I love but cant really help u(read I am too damn selfish) but the i will do anything i can, will help u help yrself sort. Its soothing, it heals. Love is a wonderful feeling! And making compromises in the later is SO worthy. It feels good. it strengthens the bond and makes a relationship lighter. :) U know i read this quote, " dealing with conflicts together strengthens a relationship!" (something like that!) its soo wiseee!
My fav word used to be 'nice' but i think I like 'cute' more now. It sounds cuter!
I asked one of my cuzins to put aside this yellow dress for me! I love yellow!!!! dresses mein yellow looks cute. esp on gals. I think guys look kinda goofy-cute in yellow! not goofy-goofy, goofy-cute!
I am glad i got ma ears pierced (like 3 years bac) i love wearing my earings. Though, my ears hurt now!
Been sleeping loads! :D dun wana be tired!!!:p

Shopping, shopping and more shopping!

I went shopping yesterday! Yeah!! Handbags, purses, jewellery(again!), T-shirts! All I need are shoes now! Yeah! There are gona be so many bags... Good to fill up my stationery and stuff!
7 days until I leave! Am really excited! I cant stop thinking abt my handbags! :) I have this thing for blue things! I haev like 3 blue bags already and (they are of different shades though!) I got another one yesterday! But its SO CUTE!! It looks elegant!
Its light blue with this shiny thing on one side! (I dunno how to describe it!) Yeah i even got blue jewellery!
And I got this black bag.... not too big, not to small! Thats why they call it bags I guess. (Otherwise it wud have been BIG bag!) :D! Man theres so much to do! Not that i really mind! But i still got this sore throat thingy. Am kinda sleepy!

How to make a me!

How to make a Naureen

Ingredients: 1 part mercy 3 parts ambition 3 parts ego

Method: Add to a cocktail shaker and mix vigorously. Serve with a slice of emotion and a pinch of salt. Yum!

Username:http://www.go-quiz.com/cocktail/cocktail.php">Username:%20name="uname">

oyeee!

logoon! where are yr comments? Absar especially! where are yr comments for my blogs - latest ones!? !

It rained!

Yeah !!! kinda more of a drizzle and less of a rain but it rained :) Someone told me its her b day she was damn happy!
I hae been up all nite! kinda tired!
11 days until i leave. Theres a lot to do which is good. I hate sitting falto!
Found out two more ppl from my area who got admitted in ma batch! cool! Yeah wont be alone i guess :) I will make new friends too.
i am sleepy!
Hmm we are gona be assigned a facutly advisor! Hope mine is cute! ;) yeah they gona be old I guess but no problem!LUMS is a uni with young students ! so that balances!;)

I had a good day today ALHAMDULILAH :)
I am glad to be me!
YAY!
I love music too!

...

Nothing but pennies
In my pocket
Nothing but faith to
Keep me warm
Well baby,I'd be broke without it
Tell me, how muchFor your love?
Slip my heart inYour back pocket
All that I got toKeep me warm
So babyDon't leave me here without it
Tell me how muchFor your love?

-"In My Pocket",Mandy Moore

Still sore throat a bit gota study functions (maths) and wana watch friends!

registered for the courses today! pre-Calculus, Intro to Computing, Principles of Eco :D

What else? I am thankful hat i renewed my credit! Love to bug friends :)

At times the things u truly want, u get them :)

Gotta Open up

I got a sore throat. Its really hurting now. When I gulp aur waisay bhi it hurts a bit... Hmm gota treat it!
15 days left until i leave. I sometimes cant believe I am leaving. I was up most of the night last night thinking abt the familarity of this place. No, i am not some i-cant-live-without-my-home person but the reality of it hit me yesterday. I am not scared, I am a bit confused. But then, i love nights and wud love to have someone to talk to all night! someone i find interesting! yeah i can do that on holidays there, itni sari larkiyan hongi and yr interests bring u together! Its gona be fun :D
feels weird but believe me, i wudnt have it any other way. :) I am gona work on things and manage them.
I am getting the opportunity to educate myself, really educate myself... i am gona INSHALLAH make the best of it. :)

No one missed me!

I signed in like after a week... and no real messages! :P My computer kinda crashed and phone bhi kharab hogaya! no one missed my blogs? :P

Have a cup of tea by my side. Found my 2 favourite rings... had misplaced them 2 months or so bac :D Mom ound them... am wearing them! I love being silly at home. Played wid my stuffed bunny yesterday. threw and caught him! Its fun

I feel lighter today. I decided to let go :)
Life feels wonderful. I feel. I feel i am walking between eternity.. am content wid the past and soothed by the future. the present is divine. I love it. Morning ... walking into the sky or so it feels!:)

I cant

I cant go on pretending everythings fine
I cant really stop thinking abt it
I am sick of thinking abt it all the time
I KNOW things are gonna get better
Maybe its that pain.. that dry itchy pain which prevails when the wound's abt to close.
I think so.

I gota collect myself.
Maintain my calm
Its ok to freak out sometimes
But i gota take care of myself and of ppl i care for the most,
who have, somehow, hurt me the most.

I still need them, in one way or the other. Thats the irony.
One way or the other, its good. Or else, its gonna be extremely lonely.

In real, I cant wait for the silver lining to unfold.
Allah must have some grand work there. Some glory.
I know. I can feel it :)
Now thats teh good part.

Its ok, its almost over.
Almost over...
Another start then.. lets see... :) I am excited.
Its my time to sit back, relax and trust Him.